Liberals admit shoplifting from Whole Foods as a twisted way to stick it to Bezos for not hating Trump

A cast of characters dubbed the “anti-Amazon avengers” argued how their beef with billionaire Jeff Bezos justified five-finger discounts and cheating the system.

“I feel like the Batman of returns.”

Misguided miscreants like the Occupy movement have long twisted the mythos of Robin Hood to that of a hero sticking it to the rich instead of its roots in opposition to excessive taxation. Now, according to a report from Business Insider’s Emily Stewart, shoplifting is increasingly being justified at Whole Foods by “middle-class and even seemingly wealthy” leftists because they identify themselves as the “comparatively poor” in their fantasy.

“If a billionaire can steal from me, I can scrape a little off the top, too,” a man referred to as Lee expressed as he described his actions at the supermarket owned by founder and executive chairman Bezos’ Amazon.

Call his actions “grand theft auto-ing,” Lee admitted to pocketing items, entering incorrect amounts at self-checkout, and manipulating the scale at the hot bar to cheat the system.

Similarly, a man under the pseudonym Jesse, described as “a 30-something tech worker,” confessed to stealing bags of groceries from Whole Foods that included steaks. “I never felt bad for the corporation as a whole, because it was Amazon and, you know, it was Jeff Bezos. He just profits so much taking advantage of the little people, so if we as little people can bite back a little bit, and that’s me taking $100 maybe out of revenue for him, that’s a little bit of a middle finger.”

Having met with President Donald Trump at Mar-a-Lago after the 2024 election, during which his Washington Post had opted out of offering an endorsement, Bezos continued earning the ire of leftists by contributing to the GOP leader’s inauguration and demanding political balance from his newspaper’s opinion pages.

“They’re crazy people. They’re out of control,” Bezos reportedly told Trump.

Jeff Bezos vented to Trump that his WaPo staff is ‘out of control’ and ‘crazy’ https://t.co/oUCzXLC9qt

— BPR (@BIZPACReview) March 26, 2025

Other examples of the inanity on the left found Carson, described as someone who “works in the nonprofit sector,” telling Stewart he viewed Bezos as a Superman villain.

“It’s easy to look at him like a Lex Luthor,” argued the individual who estimated he’d been ripping off at least $1,000 of groceries annually while also hosting parties with a grand worth of decorations purchased at Amazon that he later returned. “Who’s actually hurt in this strange, dehumanized system?”

Similarly, Jimmy expressed to Stewart. “I feel like the Batman of returns. I choose my targets.”

An example of his scheming involved returning a broken video game controller after buying a replacement, “We know how much money that company makes. They’re not going to be worried about that $70.”

Suggesting that the actions were “better than setting Teslas on fire,” Stewart made clear that admitted offenses were way off the mark in attempting to slight Bezos.

“None of what they’re doing is actually making the type of impact they might like to see, and they’re conveniently ignoring Bezos’ positive contributions, such as his philanthropy. And they could be causing unintended harm to the non-Bezoses of the world, as in, everyone else,” she noted, on top of shoplifting leading to some retailers locking goods away and inconveniencing fellow customers, “Shoplifting can demoralize workers, and if enough people can do it, it may lead companies to raise prices, or in the case of return fraud, mean businesses make sending unwanted items back a lot harder.”

Additionally, she reminded, “If you steal from Whole Foods, Bezos won’t know, but the store manager who’s fired over it will.”

Staff Writer

Native of Brooklyn, NY, Kevin Haggerty is a graduate of Hunter College where he studied Cultural Anthropology and Geography. An avid reader and truth seeker, he currently resides in Texas with his wife and their dog and, when he isn’t researching current events and their impacts, you’ll find him spending time with friends and family or working on his next novel.

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